Joy

Without pain there can be no joy. We would not know how to recognize joy without the capacity to feel and know all that there is besides joy itself.

In our New Age culture, we must be careful to stay authentic within ourselves; feeling our grief, our anger and sadness and our joy. There is a tendency to think if we are feeling pain, then we are doing something wrong. Our thoughts should be positive at all times and our emotions will follow. This philosophy is not only shallow in nature, but keeps us from experience the depth of life. All emotions give us the fullest experience of life and keep us present in each moment to savor the goodness and deal authentically with the challenges we are offered.

Emotional Sobriety does not mean we do not feel our emotions. On the contrary, emotional sobriety creates within us the capacity to feel our emotions fully and deeply. Through this experience, we allow our emotions to inform us of our connections to all aspects of our lives. In informing us of our connections, we can all consciously choose our responses to these connections. Our feelings and emotions are in service to our highest good.

As we become skilled at allowing our emotions to inform us, we develop a capacity for joy as well. The joy of detachment, clarity and choice.

Blessings on your journey to emotional sobriety,

Sally

Emotional Sobriety Today; Surrendering to the Unknown

Learning to live authentically and emotionally sober, when we have lived out of our old beliefs and fears, takes courage. We must surrender ourselves to a Power greater than ourselves and trust this journey of personal transformation. We look honestly at ourselves, our own codependency, rage, unhealthy emotional connections with others and what it really means to be emotional sober and mature. We risk doing things differently. Here are some tips for transforming old behaviors and unhealthy relationships into authentic, emotionally sober connections:

1) Develop a relationship with a Higher Power. Nurturing this spiritual connection requires daily prayer and meditation. Even five minutes a day will begin to nourish this spiritual practice and provide us with a tool that we can use in our lives on a daily basis. We learn to bring our shame, chronic codependency, fear of abandonment and other intense emotions to our Spiritual practice and then risk learning new ways to interact with ourselves and others.

2) Develop relationships with others in 12 step recovery and/or those who choose to address their own chronic love addiction, codependency and emotionally immature behaviors. Knowing that we are not alone and there are others who have gone before us to share their wisdom and experience makes all the difference. Feeling connected to a personal growth community gives us courage, strength and unlimited resources when we need them.

3) Emotional Sobriety requires great courage as we keep the focus on ourselves and our own compulsive care-taking, rage and fears of abandonment. Continue to look inside, especially when faced with a new insight into self or feeling the tension internally develops emotional capacity. The compulsion to act out emotionally will pass and we continue on our path, seek support and bring our old pain and trauma to our higher power. Looking within and learning self-nurturing is the answer. Seeking support from those on the same journey of emotional sobriety and maturity assists us risking new behaviors and surrendering to the unknown as well.

Blessings on your journey,

Sally