It's not that I don't know how to share, or let someone else have a turn. I do. It's more related to big decisions related to my family, my children and my husband. I want others to do what I want them to do, but mostly it is with my family. I don't tolerate irresponsibility well and when I think our children are lacking individual responsibility, I want to take action, set boundaries and allow for the natural consequences of these choices. Unfortunately, my husband and I do not always agree on what it means to be responsible and/or lacking in individual responsibility. These things are obvious to me. Why are they not obvious to him?!
Okay, okay. So maybe I have some self-righteousness about it all. I'm pretty sure I am right and we should adjust our actions according to my way of seeing things. Chances are I do see some things than perhaps my husband is now able or willing to see right now; especially related to his son. But still, we have to live together, eat together and reside in the same bed together. How do I live in harmony and joy with him when he is not open to my way of handling a situation?!
Detaching with love and compassion is the way. It feels impossible at times, to be able to simply detach. Most especially when there seems to be so much at stake, but I think it is the way to go. Internally, I must tap into the resource of the Divine Connections and Guides, ask for their help in letting go of having it my way and breath deeply, receiving some comfort and release. I want to detach with love as well since I am well practiced in detaching with anger and I'll show you energy. Just letting go, trusting and turning it over to the Divine resources available, not only to me, but available to my husband and son. This is a great reminder. I am not the only one who loves my son or may think, with certainty, what is best for him.
In detaching with love, I can also get clear about my own boundaries and tolerance for my children or husband's behaviors. I can say where the line is drawn with money or time given that affects me. This is good to note; what I have a choice about in terms of self-care, and what is best left in Divine Care (like trying to get my husband to do it my way.)
That's why I write. When I start with what is most challenging in my emotional life and share knowing that I will be witnessed by another, some answer and clarity emerges from within. There is still discomfort in sitting with not getting my way but it's not as intense and I have a wider perspective.
I'd still like to know what you do when you don't get your way. Come on. Tell me the good stuff. We need to bond together. I won't tell. I promise. I'm listening........
Soon,
Sally
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